Phantasm
by Piratzi
Summary: Snape asks why Harry comes to him at night, Harry asks why he lets him.


Rating: PG-13 for sensuality.  
  
Categories: Angst, Songfic, Romance  
  
Summary: Harry Potter and Severus Snape are nothing alike.   
  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and Severus Snape, as well as related characters and phrases, are not my property and belong to J.K. Rowling, I am making absolutely no money off of this, and it is merely the fantasy of an indulgent art student with too much time on her hands. Please don't sue me unless you REALLY want my Chinese Coke can collection, because I have NO money. Song lyrics are from Sarah Brightman's "La Mer".  
  
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It is nights like this that draw him to me. Nights that pulse with slow tender chanting of ancient rhythmic mysteries, of primal entwinings of the divine beings, nights when the curtains of velvet tsunami rain draw apart and the heavy coating of moisture in the air threatens to suffocate outright. In the glaring light of the blue moon, he slips in nearly unnoticed. His careful hands shut the door firmly, glimmering peridot eyes darting into the peripheral, taking in the unlit dwelling. His panther - like long legs execute liquid strides as he works his way over. He doesn't call out from my entry, he doesn't need to, but only slips off his shoes and appears as a mirage on dark leather couches. There he is, I catch a breath as I gaze upon him, a true god and thorn-in-my-side for seven years, Harry Potter.  
  
i  
  
Ancient unknown mammals   
  
On a stormy sea   
  
Like Buddha in the water   
  
A velvet energy  
  
/i  
  
I walk forward with a tentative step, body shivering as he stands before me, clad in only a silken robe. He doesn't speak, but then, it is always like this with us, neither speaking, each afraid to break the spell that draws us together like this with such threatening need for the other. My rogue hand catches the side of his face, feeling him arch up into my touch. That tempestuous cavern of a mouth moans ever softly and I feel the heated, moist breath hit my skin. I shiver involuntarily. It's an incantation, standing so close together, my eyes gazing down to look into his pale ones. Neither of us speaks, each needing only the night music to guide us. We step away from reality, gauzy cerulean silk exploding before my sight. His eyes close gracefully, making perfect arcs of dark smudges on his glistening silver skin. Slowly, I drink him in, feeling him burn and scorch my esophagus with every inch of that aching fiery tongue.  
  
i  
  
As the night takes over   
  
The spirits of the deep   
  
Marvel at his majesty   
  
The whale is in his sleep  
  
/i  
  
It seems impossible to understand this relationship; night after night I have spent over a glass of Merlot and that very burning question in my skull. It would only be known that when his silken skin touches mine, I feel at peace, and when his life force explodes in my reluctant mouth, I feel alive. He has broken me, I live only for him and when he leaves, I will cease to be. Our lives together are not so much a reality but a mirage rising up out of the dusk, a visage of a promising naked god offering his nubile body to an incredulous soul.   
  
But on nights like this, none of that matters. Only his blessedly soft firm step is my iraison d'etre/i, his slender pale frame, soft glittering hair falling in his sight as he leans languidly against the doorframe, drawing me to him magnetically with those seductive virescent eyes. I could spend forever drowning in the sensations he paints in me. In the span of millennia, we mold together, flesh melting into flesh, flowing into the other's veins, tasting the nectar of the /i of the deep.   
  
i  
  
La Mer   
  
You're shimmering through   
  
La Mer   
  
Magnificent Blue  
  
/i  
  
He is my every being; perfectly manipulating my every nerve – and slowly, I allow myself to cool his fire, to heat my ice. Ancient compliments – he is the light to my darkness, the fury to my detachment. We dance the primordial dance together, villain and hero alike.  
  
My eyes strain to see him, but the darkness prohibits it. His hand ghosts down my body, dreamily tracing esoteric designs on my solar plexus. His silhouette covers mine, drowning me in his darkness, tasting me through his shadowy worlds. I have wondered before if he wasn't real, only a phantasm, a figment of my desirous imagination. Did Chiron ship you over Styx to inspire the devotion of the masses? I wonder… you're not like us, are you, Harry?  
  
i  
  
Shimmering through the water   
  
In search of sanctuary   
  
Currents travel faster   
  
In alien territory  
  
/i  
  
On nights like this – I need him like an addict to the drug. With each fiber of my existence, I crave him. I feel him tighten around me, my eyes rolling back into my head, blood vessels straining, my hands touching and grasping, needing to breathe by the wonder of his smooth expanses of pale skin. A moan passes his lips and I dive my seeking hand southward, into the wet central heat of his body. He screams with the contact and I press my lips to his, taking and demanding past the serpentine curves, asking so much as I gently trace my tongue along the part of his lips. He tastes like storms and night music – an enigma impossible to forget. Would I have to? Would I need to drown his memory in lines of bitter potions and a clumsy kiss or two? He presses his mouth more firmly against mine, sensing my confusion. We speak only in our kisses – wordless questions the other is terrified to answer. I ask him why he comes to me. He asks me why I let him.   
  
i  
  
Dancing in the distance   
  
In a puff of spray   
  
In a single moment,   
  
The dolphin glides away  
  
/i  
  
He presses his coral lips to the shell of my ear and I shiver. His long graceful hands wrap around my neck, tangling in my dark, sweaty hair, pulling me down alongside him. My body gives into the comfort of stained satin sheets and a warm body willingly and my tainted psyche's cement walls crash relentlessly down. Don't go again, please. Don't shut that door behind you and leave me a cold prisoner, a starling with a broken wing.  
  
"Don't leave me, Harry." My voice trembled in the darkness. Not again, I couldn't live to watch him walk out my door again. Out my door, carrying my bleeding, torn heart on his sleeve. His fingers stilled in their tracing of my eyelids and he laughed. I winced, for he laughed often, when he was happy, but also when he was sad.   
  
"You're beautiful, Severus." His breath ghosted over my ears, already a memory. The bed groaned as he lifted himself off of it. His catlike steps echoing down the hallway. One tear escaped my eye, one tear for all the love I had for him. iTears, heartdew, griefhoney, sadwater, die tränen, eau de douleur, los rios del corazón./i Don't leave me, Harry, for when you exit that door into the gusty bales of night, who will we become? I have shaped myself to be everything you are not – refined where you are blunt, dark where you are bright, reserved while you are open. You are my relief and when you are gone I will fade away.  
  
Warmth pressed itself to my forehead; I opened my eyes and found his glittering back at me. He crawled into the bed and wrapped his lightly muscled arms around my middle.   
  
"How could I go when you ask me like that?" He whispered softly. Fresh tears seeped softly from my eyes, and I buried my head into his shallow chest. The lolling beats of slumber washed over me, content in Harry's strong warmth.  
  
"iYou know, I love you/i." He sighed and kissed my head, "but that can wait till morning."  
  
As Somnus reached his soothing hands over me, I felt my heartstrings burn. 


End file.
